Despite appearances to the contrary, I am actually a professional comedy, content and copy writer with clients including fancy-pants firms, snazzy social-media channels and some other alliterative combinations of adjectives and industries which I can't be arsed to think of right now.
My break came thanks to Radio 4's Newsjack and The Show What You Wrote, with my work being broadcast via those shows on "a bunch" of occasions. I was also invited in to the writer's meetings for a couple of series, but they've now put a restraining order in place because I was simply too hilarious.
I am currently the sole writer for the Strange Mysteries Youtube channel, and since taking over content duties in May 2015 I have snaffled over 1.3million additional subscribers. At one point we were hoovering up more subs per day than Beyonce, which means that at one point in my life I was more interesting than Queen B.
I also write for a Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game called Torn, which the Daily Star once revealed as being a big hit in Theresa May's office during her time as Home Secretary. Although she did later say that she personally hated the game, but she also hates foreigners and Europe and free speech, so what does she know?
My other bits and pieces include copywriting for a major international firm whose name rhymes with Bronson & Bronson, coming up with jokes for stand-up entertainers, and the creation of 20,000 animal puns for a website most accurately described as Tinder for pets.
On Fridays, I write comedy about the future. This is my own stuff, for me and my brain. I'll share it with the world one day, you'll see.
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